Just how to Survive Valentine’s Day as being a Newly Single Woman, in accordance with a Breakup Coach
I am aware it’s daunting to take into account the method that you’re going to survive Valentine’s Day as being a newly single lady. I’ve asked Nancy Deen, my friend which happens to be an expert breakup coach, to help you.Here you go…from Nancy:
I have had my fair share of breakups, i am aware it can be painful to watch everyone else celebrating as long as you’re, well—miserable. You despise the fact that this peudo-holiday just rubs it in the face that you’re no longer in a relationship. (Thanks, as if I need full-blow romantic couples just rubbing their love and lust right in my own face while my heart is torn wide-open.)
But, you’re also kind of aware that you actually enjoy this day, but just not this year. You love it when you’re celebrating. (Duh.)
This Valentine’s Day, I’ve got you covered. You deserve to however participate in the afternoon, even minus the overpriced flowers and three-week waitlisted restaurants with fixed-menu specials.
Alright, let’s dive in.
At-Home Spa and Self-Care Night
If you’re fresh out of a relationship, chances are you really don’t want to leave the house this Valentine’s Day. As such, I strongly suggest drawing the best shower (apparently the most effective bath temp is 90F-105F) and giving yourself some much needed TLC. I don’t know about you but there is nothing a good bath cannot solve in my life. (But if that doesn’t work, then I call my mother.)
Here’s how to turn your bath into the full spa experience:
- Your favourite glass of wine (red or white ladies, I don’t discriminate) or opt for a sexy beverage
- A relaxing playlist (Spotify has so many spa playlists)
- Put your phone on silent so you don’t feel a pull to check your phone (and ensure that is stays in a different room)
- Several drops of scented essential oils or bubble bath for an aromatic experience (I personally love this bottle of Lavender)
- A bathrobe to wear right after
Movie Marathon with Friends
Whenever I’m feeling blue, or just feeling like I don’t want to leave the household, there’s a movie for every mood. I’ll be honest; I have nights when I don’t actually discover how I’m feeling, and I let my mood figure out what movie is most beneficial to soothe me. (I can’t be the only 1 who does this?)
When it comes to movie marathons, I’ve got 2 options for you:
OPTION 1: Host a movie night with friends this Valentine’s Day and avoid crowds and couples altogether. No sense uberhorny e seguron in getting triggered today and spiraling into those obsessive thoughts over your ex.
If you want to take it to another level, feel free to watch the final 3 decades of horror movies.
OPTION 2: A solo movie evening. You’re likely a hard-working woman which rarely (never?) cuts herself a break enough to let herself truly binge Netflix. Let yourself tonight, got it? You’ve got nowhere becoming, so let yourself enjoy this time.
Mid-day Solo Date
If you however want to go out, but don’t want to be bombarded by all the couples everywhere, opt for a solo lunch date.
Most couples are likely reserving the restaurants for the evening, so why not take today to treat yourself to that [insert luxury item] that you’ve been eyeing. (Just dooooo it!)
Donate to a Worthy Cause
Don’t want to buy anything for yourself? Let me ask you this: simply how much would you have spent on your significant other for their gift and for the evening?
Use that money and give it to a worthy cause. If you are reading this when it’s posted, Australia’s wildlife really needs the funds. Here’s just how to donate (across towards the end of the article.)When we have been having a tough time emotionally, we need to reach out and give to others who are in need.
When I’m having a tough day, I head over to my local meditation centre, and they often remind me that when I’m feeling deep in my own despair, it’s best to serve others and take the focus off of me for a moment. We can get so caught up in what’s not going right for us that sometimes we forget that others are having a harder time right now.
Get Guidance Across Love and Relationships
Make Valentine’s Day a productive one by hiring a coach to support you in your love life. A year ago this was a fun, motivating and popular choice for single ladies.
Maybe you’re finally out of that toxic relationship, or finally made the commitment to yourself to leave a relationship that wasn’t progressing. Now you can start manifesting the right relationship for you.
(To manifest: create what you want with the mind first, so that it can appear into your reality.)
It’s time to take all the crap that happened in your last relationship and make Valentine’s Day lemonade, damnit.
If you’d like to connect deeper on your own breakup, book a consult with me here.
Create a Vision Board
When I left my last relationship, I was all about ‘creating my future and vision boards became my best friend. They truly are not just woo-woo or for men and women in their 20s; in fact, Oprah, Will Smith, Steve Harvey and Jim Carrey all believe in them and have seen simply how much they truly work. (Why: because they keep you focused on your actual goals.)
You’ve heard of the vision board, but what could it be, exactly?
Well, it’s where you put images and words of things, experiences, and people you want in your life. It’s the ultimate manifesting tool. Try it! (I love the phrase manifesting, in case you haven’t noticed.)
Feel free to do this one during your movie marathon, or with friends. Use Canva or the traditional way:
What you need to produce a gorgeous and inspiring vision board:
White glue (that dries clear)
Old magazines (yikes they’re like $6+ these days!) to clip them
printed photos from the internet
2-3 hours of uninterrupted time to enter into flow
killer music/movie playlist
Please send me your Vision board to firstname.lastname@example.org should you choose opt to follow this! I’d love to see what you come up with!
Various other Tips to Help You By Way Of A Breakup
Every day is going to feel different, so embrace what emotions come through. Don’t let how tough yesterday was to decide how today are going to be.
Give yourself permission to feel sad. The more you embrace the emotion, the sooner it’ll pass. (i am aware it doesn’t feel like it, but it will).
Try not to rush the process. I am aware you want to be finished with the emotions, but they are serving a purpose. What that purpose is, well—that’s part of the process. You’re healing through this.
Be kind to yourself. I am aware you might be defaulting to thinking how you could have prevented the breakup, or where you could being a ‘better partner. The reality is that this can be time for you to turn inward and deepen your compassion for yourself. When you place all this guilt and blame on yourself, you’re punishing yourself. Breakups don’t serve to punish us, but to teach us, and help us heal.
Know that you are progressing, no matter if it doesn’t always feel like it. When you have one good day, followed by a terrible day, you’re not regressing, as you might think. This can be all part of the process. Process isn’t linear, and breakups are no exception to this rule.
I hope these a few ideas speak to you this valentine’s. I am aware how tough it really is to have throughout your first Valentine’s Day solo, but remember why you’re doing this—for you. For your growth, development, and learning.
You’ve got this more than you know. And I’ve got your back, too!
If you need support during your breakup, please reach out to Nancy and let her help you!
Sometime you can’t get men to talk on dates. But I hear stories all the time about men talking too much on dates. They blab their heads off as the woman sits quietly nodding and ‘uh-hu-ing. (Notice I didn’t say she was listening.)
Inevitably, these two will never have another date…unless the woman exercises some compassion and knows how to kindly stop him from yapping. (Which, btw, may be saving him from himself!)
We gals generally speaking have the propensity to chat for the sake of it. I love that about women and wouldn’t get it any other way! Yet on dates, it’s not uncommon for it to be the contrary, with the man chattering away.
It could be a sign that he’s completely self-centered or overcompensating for insecurity and that you ought to run for the hills. Or he could be nervous.
But there is another reason men talk plenty on dates that I don’t think we start thinking about:
Single men rarely get the opportunity to talk about themselves and their everyday lives, and our femininity brings this out in them.
Take 10 and watch my video for more about why men try this and what to do to have them to STOP! Then…give me your tips below, ok?
With regards to picking a forever partner, what do mature men want from women? As always, I’m talking about Good Grownup Men.
What these guys are seeking in a forever partner is unique of what 20 or 30-something men are trying to find. Knowing the difference will allow you to make certainly deep connections with good men all around you.
Mature (grownup!) men have confidence and a strong sense of self. They know what they want and don’t want. They show up in life with authority, power, and strength.
For the mature man, relationships are no longer all about libido and ego. They are trying to find real connection.
That’s the guy you need, right?
Well, here’s what this man wants:
He desires to have fun and have intellectual stimulation. And good sex, of course. But in order for him to feel romantic about you, he needs more.
When he’s with You he desires to be able to rest. He desires to be able to shed his proverbial suit and just be described as a nice guy and enjoy his time with you.
Some men describe this as having a safe destination to land.
If you want to be able to give men this gift, watch this video. Then let me know your thoughts!